February 2012
4 posts
What the fucking fuck
My Unhealthy Coworker pt 4.5
(regarding lunch)
Her: I don’t feel like eating anymore chow mein.
Me: Yea, you practically ate all of it for breakfast.
Her: I don’t feel good.
Me: Well, eating greasy soy sauce msg for breakfast isn’t always good for you.
Her: I feel like being naughty. Wanna go to McDonalds?
Me: HELL NO.
Her: Come on. You don’t want anything?
Me: I didn’t work out at 5am...
My unhealthy coworker, part 4
Me: are you seriously eating that for breakfast?!!?
Her: yea, what’s wrong with chow mein??
Me: uhhhhh it’s not even 8am. What about your blood pressure?!?
Her: but I really want it *pouts* I was craving it last night. Damn. Now I ate my lunch for today. Oh well. I guess I’ll go out again.
Me: I can’t believe you ate an entire container of chow mein for breakfast. ...
Hello Kitty
I want to shoot myself in the face.
I have this 48 yr old co-worker who is not all mentally there or something. She has Hello Kitty everything. Hello Kitty headband. Hello kitty cell phone case. Hello Kitty keychain. Hello Kitty LUNCHBOX.
Da fuq?!?
It’s one of the new hires. Let me just put it out there that I have no control over who is hired or fired. Incompetent people are just thrown...
January 2012
24 posts
My coworkers
So much SHIT has been happening at work. Lots of great stories for my series about my coworkers. Too many for me to jot them all down.
I will say one thing though.
I didn’t think it was possible to hire someone dumber than Burrito Boy. I was wrong.
My superiors have gone a hired someone dumber.
FML.
6 tags
derpina - Level: ASIAN. →
i see what you did there.
kyuusai:
msanthropic:
ROFLMAOOOOOO
kyuusai:
my betch approached me and requested that i compile all of the photos she took of the derpina memes in one image…
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
click for larger photo. created on paint (no photoshop FAIL).
Reglobbin to reglob
4 tags
derpina - Level: ASIAN. →
ROFLMAOOOOOO
kyuusai:
my betch approached me and requested that i compile all of the photos she took of the derpina memes in one image…
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
click for larger photo. created on paint (no photoshop FAIL).
New Coworkers.
My department has hired some new folks.
Expect more stories soon, especially since one was drinking a Diet Coke at 7:45am today. That one is a total weirdo.
My Unhealthy Coworker part 3.5
Remember how she ate curly fries for breakfast with butter milk ranch sauce while driving and got a penis shaped cum looking stain on her chest?
Yea so.
This morning she was eating fish sticks at 7:50am.
Today I was really busy training someone so I didn’t notice until late afternoon but…..
She was wearing the same shirt she wore last week.
The buttermilk sauce left an...
3 tags
4 tags
5 tags
3 tags
“Dear Hollywood- Not sure I understand this correctly. You want to censor the...”
– saw this on my friend’s FaceBook today
My Unhealthy Coworker pt3
Her: I spilled buttermilk on myself!!!!
Me: How on Earth did you spill buttermilk on yourself? It’s only 8am!!
Her: I spilled it while I was driving here
Me: what the hell?? What were you doing while driving??? Making fried chicken??
Her: no… I was eating curly fries
Me: FOR BREAKFAST?!
Her: yea…
Me: so much for that diet. It looks like a jizz stain. You sure it’s...
4 tags
4 tags
kyuusai said: is there something drastically different between black/white truffle? a guy i knows likes to put white truffle oil on mac n cheese. tastes like gasoline to me -_- but you put black truffle butter on everything. is it yummier??
^ To answer your question betch, YES!!!...
5 tags
…
People always come to me for advice.
You what’s fucking stupid?
Nobody gives me any good advice.
whine whine whine
wah wah wah
I wish I never met you.
Because now I have to pretend I never did, and it sucks.
December 2011
26 posts
3 tags
3 tags
6 tags
“Once you pass a certain age, life becomes nothing more than a process of...”
– From “1Q84” by Haruki Murakami
5 tags
My Unhealthy Co-worker pt2
This is a story about my unhealthy co-worker. The one I’ve written about previous. You remember right? The one who ate L&L Hawaiin BBQ for breakfast.
Yea, that one.
In the month of October, I noticed that she was frequently late to work. She would call in and say she was running late. Normally when people say they’re running late, they are referring to a couple of minutes here...
4 tags
So emo.
I’m staying up late even though I know I shouldn’t be. I should be sleeping early since I’m almost done getting over a cold.
I’m writing Christmas cards and getting all emotional because im on my period. I want to cry.
I fucking hate you emotions!!!
kyuusai asked: I didn't buy tickets yet lol. I want to go though, it's just up in the air. PuHAHAHA @Kaskade. if you do go, do you have a white outfit picked out? And if I do go, let's meet up :)
My Unhealthy Co-Worker
This bitch complains about how I was out sick for 2 days.
Bitch!
I was legitimately sick!
Let me tell you something! This heffer is constantly late to work, falls asleep at work, or doesn’t even show up. Why? Oh, not because she’s sick but because she stays up late fucking some guy she’s seeing.
First of all, I know it’s been awhile.
I know you have 2 kids and...
6 tags
Wtf?
I’m riding BART right now. The car I’m in actually has a urine stench. I am afraid to sit down despite the fact that I have a huge bag of groceries I’m carrying to work. I looked and there isn’t a homeless person on the train.
I know i shouldnt be sitting on bART anyways, theres fecal matter on the cloth seats. The stench is obviously urine. It’s somewhere on the...
2 tags
3 tags
3 tags
4 tags
